Higher Unlearning

Lost Boys

Toronto was reeling after learning that the person arrested for sexually assaulting over a dozen women in a section of the city during the summer of 2012 was a 15 year old boy. Jeff Perera looks back at an experience with two young boys on the train and reflects on what he wishes he said to … Continue reading »

Understanding Boys, Understanding Girls.

— Invited to speak at various Boys conferences, Jeff Perera shares some stories of taking the White Ribbon message on the road to speak with boys from Grade Four to Grade Eight. He also shares what happened when he spoke with hundreds of young girls on how society creates ideas of being a man and … Continue reading »

Kurt Cobain: my role model of being a Male Ally, In Utero

Jeff Perera with a look at one of his first role models to being an advocate, finding your voice, and speaking up against gender inequality: Kurt Cobain. “Never met a wise man, if so it’s a woman” – Kurt Cobain , Territorial Pissings In the midst of a 1991 audio swamp of conservative, manufactured … Continue reading »

What’s Your Relationship With Your Relationship?

__ Every year in North America, on February 13th, an annual ritual unfolds… one that sees large lines of feverish and frenzied men magically materialize in public spaces. Lined up to be the first to get their hands on the newest video game? purchase the latest smartphone? for the urinal at a rock concert?? … Continue reading »

Of Monsters and Elephants: Real Men from New Delhi, India to Steubenville, USA

From America to India, going out to see ‘Life of Pi’ or being at a party should not be an event in your day where risk being harassed, raped or not coming back alive. – The Elephant At the beginning of most of my talks, I tell the audience that I am an Elephant Hunter. My … Continue reading »

What Drives Some Men to Massacre? Part 2

Jeff Perera reflects on the Newtown tragedy by sharing how violence factored into his three middle & elementary schools talks a week after a shooting in Toronto. The words ‘Hold’ and ‘Secure’ should be words of warmth that wrap around you, not words of fear that wrap around your ribcage so you can’t breath… ___ … Continue reading »

What Drives Some Men to Massacre? Part 1

When a tragedy like the devastating shootings at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut takes place, two things happen: 1. Everyone wants answers. 2. Few want to discuss causes. The press swarm and share details like rations to a starved public: the weapons used, the clothes the murderer wore, the guaranteed quotes from shooter’s … Continue reading »

Can’t you take a joke?

In the first of a series of guest posts on Higher Unlearning, Kate Adach takes on the issue of taking issue when a joke isn’t funny. [Warning: This post contains offensive language.] My friend J.T. posted this on Facebook because he thought it was funny. I didn’t. And I wasn’t alone. Mutual friends of ours wrote to … Continue reading »

Spoken Word and Words Unspoken: Carlos Andrés Gómez and Young Men in Crisis.

There is something about standing in the hallway of a school. Something about watching the students walk by, imagining who these young people might be in the future. A future political leader, entertainer or a visionary ushering in a new era in medicine or science? In some neighbourhoods, something else hangs in the air: the despair over the path … Continue reading »

Is Every Man a Castaway on their own Island?

Are you a sister, mother, daughter, girlfriend, lover, wife or friend trying to connect with a man who is so distant. Do you feel like you are a man stranded on an island and can’t find a way to communicate? You’re not alone. ____ “No man is an Island…” - John Donne ___ cast·a·way [ˈkɑːstəˌweɪ] … Continue reading »

Why Dudes need to be pissed off about Sexual Assault and Harassment (and Saveface)

Jeff Perera feels we need more men speaking out against violence happening to women and less men getting defensive like the ‘SaveFace’ “Men build too many walls and not enough bridges.” – Isaac Newton “You gotta have ‘game’ Bro.” Whether from popular movies, classmates or advertising, Men and Boys are surrounded with thoughts and messages … Continue reading »

Hip Checks and Gut Checks: How Homophobia impacts Heterosexual Male Athletes

Jeff Perera looks at how sexism and homophobia in sport directly impacts heterosexual young men and boys and the need to create athletic spaces for everyone regardless of sexual orientation. ___ What a difference it makes when someone has your back. It is excruciatingly difficult to face everyday moments in the game of life if not … Continue reading »

Fiats of Strength?

Another example of an ad trying to tell you that being a ‘Real Man’ is a cost paid by Women and felt by Men. As International Anti-Street Harassment Week approaches, Jeff Perera explores how these streets intersect. Meet Abarth… Fiat is an Italian automobile manufacturer that has struggled to make it in the North American … Continue reading »

Chris Brown and The Sounds of Young Men in Free Fall

I was raised in the Jane & Finch area, a storied neighborhood in the city of Toronto infamous for violence and poverty, but also home to some amazing people. I grew up alongside people of African, Caribbean, Latin, Asian and South Asian descent. For the most part, I grew up not considering myself the … Continue reading »

Fist-of-Cuffs: A response to ‘Toronto, City of Sissies’

There was a huge response to a recent article in ‘The National Post’ by writer Christie Blatchford regarding the men of Toronto. It was a call for Toronto to stop being a ‘City of Sissies’. In response, I am going to share two things with you: a moment and a secret. First, I am going to … Continue reading »

T.I., ‘Gender Night’ and Unlearning Misogyny

Higher Unlearning is excited to share this guest blog piece by Joel Anderson originally posted by Stop Street Harassment. *click Joel’s picture for the original article* “As boys, we had to learn that all women and girls deserved better than our crude war-room banter, whether it came at camp or from our favorite musicians. We would need … Continue reading »

#ManHug: The Men who MANtain and the Men Who Hug.

As White Ribbon launches a movement asking men to open up and connect, Jeff Perera looks back at how Higher Unlearning was born and the reason White Ribbon started #ManHug – So Gentlemen, are you familiar with the ‘Bro-Hug’ ? – Or maybe you do ‘The Side Hug’? – You see, hugs can be awkward for some guys… … Continue reading »

Blowing Minds

In the second of a series of guest posts on Higher Unlearning, Tuval Dinner from the White Ribbon Campaign shares an experience connecting with young men. Last week I was lucky enough to be invited to speak at the #respect conference for high school students in Hamilton, Ontario put on by the local YWCA. I’ve … Continue reading »

Fears for Tears: Men and Vulnerability

. “We live in a vulnerable world. And one of the ways we deal with it is we numb vulnerability”. – Brene Brown. Hey. Do you want to watch a video that is guaranteed make you weep?? Ok, we’ll get to that, but first… about crying… …about that. Whenever my father walked into a … Continue reading »

Video footage of Tupac before his death!

Jeff Perera argues that the following video is actual footage of Tupac Shakur before he met his demise ** Many of us are familiar of this image of Tupac Shakur moments before he was fatally shot at 25 years of age. In the following excerpt, I explain how the video shown is footage of Tupac taken … Continue reading »

Men & Grief: Staring Down the Eye of the Storm by Carlos Andrés Gómez

An excerpt from our friend Carlos Andrés Gómez’s blog Carlos Live exploring the hurricanes of emotions men conceal in their chest. “Today is a heavy day – mere hours removed from a scary shooting outside the Empire State Building and news just now coming in of another one just south of Mexico City where my sister lives. … Continue reading »

His Last Fight. Our Ongoing Work: Thank You Jack

As we approach a year since Jack Layton died of cancer, Canadians remember his work and celebrate his life. Higher Unlearning shares Jeff Perera’s thoughts from last August when we lost Jack. My mom wasn’t a fan of the moustache.“Don’t like it” she’d say, “…he should shave it”. Upon his arrival to the national political stage … Continue reading »

Wrong Fingers: Chris Brown is a Role Model alright…

Chris Brown and his mother Joyce Hawkins on Larry King Live in 2009 where he said he’d prove to be a positive role model for his young fans. Go ahead, Tell me how he’s such a great performer and I need to drop it… Tell me how Rihanna seems to like bad boys and … Continue reading »

Ripples of Change: Frank Ocean and reactions online

The waves made throughout social media when Frank Ocean came out on Independence Day were reflective of the conversations happening across North America and of folks slowly finding the voice to have these conversations. Higher Unlearning’s Jeff Perera looks back at some of the reactions via this Storify piece ___ Reaction to Frank Ocean’s post on … Continue reading »